"Guardian" of Goof ... ooops - Good ... Grammar ?

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I don't know who the headline writer is over at the Nassau Guardian, but every now and then there's a confusing-slash-hilarious twist to some of them.

Today's paper had two marvels:

1) The front page of the business section screams out "Chickens come home" in, like, 42-point type.

Well ... the story ain't about chickens or coops. Nor my first reaction: bird flu. It's something about some companies which used to be based here but owned by Canadians and run from Canada. I guess their [ex] CEO or someone is wanted for assault in Canada. What???!!??

2) Even better ... "Officers fight to be scrutinised" has to be one of the most confusing headlines ever when one reads the opening paragraph: "Two female officers caught in fight [sic] at the East Bay police station could face disciplinary action."

And here I thought they just really, really, REALLY wanted to be looked at closely !!

But it didn't stop there ...

3) This is just bad grammar ... in the Lifestyles section, about the book "Boy Crazy!", the headline "Boy-crazy girls? If your [sic] a parent, you need help". Yup ... Mr./Ms. Headline-writer, "your" in need of a different spell-checker.

4) And in an article on the passing of Oleg Cassini he apparently underwent a sex-change operation in the first two paragraphs - being referred to several times as "she" - but I guess the operation was reversed for the rest of the piece! Apparently he did die a "he".

Merry Monday everybody ... check your spelling! Peruse your proclamations!