How NOT to get your way?

Two stories in today's local papers ... and a third that ties in nicely ... have me wondering if there are lots of folks in our society who are a bit like tone-deaf candidates at an "American Idol" audition. They just aren't reading the feedback they get from reality.

Tying all this together ...

In dealing with yesterday's stabbing of a student at a local school the police spokesman restated the need for us to provide training in alternative forms of conflict resolution. Anger management, if you will.

Yes and No ... what we do need is some basic instruction in "brought-upsy" to use a good Bahamian term! This stuff has to be learned at home ... that beating someone up doesn't get your way. That killing them certainly doesn't.

But then you have ... The adults who don't seem to know any better ...

A father is now in a very public fight for custody of his son [while never making clear why the mother is not deserving].

A family already well known for conflict in public has sued the local and international arms of UPS and everyone remotely connected therewith.

These folks don't seem to understand that the court of public opinion can be a very harsh judge indeed.

I just don't understand why, as a society, we seem to think that arguing with the public and suing the pants of anyone who walks will somehow get us what we want. Notice I said what we want. Not necessarily what we need. Not what's best for everyone involved. No. I want what I want and I want it now and someone else better fix it for me!

"Of all my mother's children ..." You know the rest.

I don't know, perhaps we are indeed unduly influenced by North American media, where it seems so much more important to people to argue in the court of public opinion than where it really matters. Natalie Holloway's mother proclaiming "Joran did it" doesn't make it so, though it seems somehow she thinks constant repetition might indeed change reality. I understand the pain involved, but still ...

Uh Uh. Repeating a statement ad nauseum doesn't increase its veracity. The principle of "innocent until proven guilty" is disposable as long as it is inconvenient? Or is it only true for me? People don't seem to see how illogical it is to insist that others cut us slack while we keep the leash as tight as possible.

Aaargh! This feels like a rant. I guess it is. I shouldn't do it.

But everyone else is ranting!

Perhaps what's important to most of us is just what "makes me feel better" ... and ranting or stabbing or suing may do just that. But only short term.

We have to keep reminding ourselves that there are long term implications to whatever we do today:

Kids will remember if we "dis" their mother in public.

People will avoid doing business with you if they come to know (as they will in this tiny country, folks) that you will try and remedy even human mistakes by harassing them to death publicly.

Solve a disagreement with physical violence and you can end up in Fox Hill.

Write weird observations in a blog and they can come back and bite!

Logical conclusions, all, but too easily forgotten in the "heat of the moment".

OK ... so none of this is new and I'm certainly not the one who invented it, but some things just need to be repeated until they do become reality. (See Aruba rant above)

CALM DOWN, FOLKS!!

p.s. By the way ... I'd love to be able to hyperlink to articles from The Tribune. No can do yet.